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DesktopWeb FormText   brawn : in love with yoga (instructors)Tue, 28 Oct 2008 23:17:41 GMT # 

tried 2 yoga classes ... which means i'm now in love with 2 more yoga instructors. serious, you put me in a dark quiet room, play some new age music, lead me through some exercises, and talk in a monotone voice ... instant love. that or cut my hair. i fall in love with all my hairdressers too. doesnt matter how big or old they are. i cant get the full service haircuts with shampoo and massage because i'd be proposing before it was all over.

so how can you be a man and do yoga? 1) never take a yoga class with a guy instructor (see above). 2) hold your hands in a fist, avoid all the hand/finger extension. especially in the overhead and prayer poses. not to mention avoiding prayer poses for other reasons. 3) ignore the instructor from time to time. i.e. dont be a sheep. 4) only place your mat in front of the room if you have visibility of the instructor. otherwise your mat needs to be behind, diagonal, or to the side of a hot yoga chick. 5) periodically wear a sleeveless shirt to remind them that you have biceps. 6) when your doing a balance pose ... purposefully fall. 7) when they tell you to close your eyes, thats your cue to look away. 8) dont do any of the advanced modifications to the poses. they tend to get less manly. 9) kick ass on plank/cobra/side plank and any pose that requires upper body strength, because that is where you have the advantage. 10) if another guy makes fun of you for taking yoga, punch them in the face.